A return to the pen

So, yeah, it's been a long time. As usual, a lot of my waking hours spent working (oh, the angst!), the remainder spent trying to make up for working, by relaxing, carousing, waking up the next day with a mild headache, and going to work again.

I've heard thatthe brain needs, every week, about 36 hours, or just shy of, to recuperate. Hence the entire need for two consecutive days off from work, and all. I'm beginning to find some sense in the notion, as I've come to see that I never really relax anymore. Barring illness and just under a week of vacation (which, as the observant reader will notice, was anything but relaxing to me), it's been around 3 months now for me with no two consecutive days of off-time. It leads to some things that are not entirely fortunate; one in particular being the carousing part.

Well, carousing is a strong word, but it does sound better than social drinking with friends and colleagues; and besides, I generally have a good time anyway. It's just...it does get to me, a bit. That I seem to, along with those I work with, seem to rebel against not having a proper weekend to party in, so we take to pseudo-partying on weekdays. I wonder if it's the first step of initiation into the "rest of the world" club, that I hear gathers in bars on fridays to complain about their job?

Heh. I don't have any significant complains about my job, I feel alright about it, I feel welcome and I know I do a good piece of work there. The trust I'm given there inspires me to better myself, raise the bar and ultimately, inspire those around me. Not because I'm an example, but because I want others to feel valued and confident as well.

I just wonder if I pace myself too much; that I'm burning myself out this way. I'm still in one piece, but I've stopped and thought more frequently over the last month. Go figure, with the weird things that's happened and all, but still. I don't feel as stalwart anymore.